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By lupe, Friday, March 13, 2009 10:53:40 PM
i ask why?????????????????????????????????????????????? Newspaper article full version In 3 more days it will have been two months since Meli's death, and her departure pains me today just as it did that very moment that i found her cold and lifeless. It is as if each second of my life someone is cutting open my heart in two and adding salt to that wound. It feels as if my soul died with her. Every time that I go into her room, which is countless times a day, I relive that horror of her leaving; I ask God where he was. Why didn't he allow me to save her? Why didn't he let me find her in time? Why didn't he choose me to take her place? I would have been ready to do that for her; I would do the same for any of my other children. As I write this, I am in her bedroom asking for answers to questions as I read over letters that she left me at different times. I tremble from pain and from anger at the futility of it all. It is so ironic, just a few months ago she and I had a long conversation about life, death, injustice, and the hypocrisy with which she was living through at that time;the pain that her boyfriend and another teen caused her. I remember that I told her: "Look, this flower; it is very pretty and so are you. Neither you nor any one else should cry over someone. You can do better than that." Her answer was: "It is not fairl everything that is happening to me. I hate going to school. I hate the schools here in Andrews. If you don't have money, if you're not the son or daughter of a rich person, if you are not of the right color, and if you are not the teacher's pet then you are nothing. You are left out. And they take away what you once had an what you worked so hard to achieve." I told her that in life nothing was fair; but, but that there was always an answer, and that things had a way of working out. I told her that death was no solution. She smiled at me and said: "Mami, there is no answer in standing up for myself against some people, I was sent to Saturday school. In cheer leading I was taken out even though I used to get up at 4:00 am to get ready to go to practice; then they replaced me with someone who used to miss countless times. But since she was seen as more favorable. Since then my world started crashing. I sure hope Crystal doesn't have to go through this" "It also isn't fair, Mami, all the times you have gone to school asking for help and they don't give it to you. The school does things as it sees fit. It is like my coach said when I lost my place at Nationals and was placed as an alternate, 'I hope it's ok because if not, you can get out. There are several that can take your place.'" "You see, Mami. I am tired of being hurt, tired of constantly coming home crying. I am tired of putting on a happy face and pretending that nothing matters after being hurt countless times. I lock myself in my room so that no one sees my pain." Many saw my daughter; she went through thousands of things, but only I saw her tears, her pain and her disenchantment. Many people contributed to her decision. Even I myself contributed to it because in the beginning when I found the first letters some months back in which she said goodbye, I did ask for help. That person that I reached to for help told me: "I guarantee that she is not going to do anything. She just wants attention." I hope that professional who told me that saw the obituary so that she can see if my daughter is now getting her attention. I wonder if all that is sufficient for that person. If she is paying, maybe she will not give such advice again. Hopefully the school is paying closer attention. Meli with her death, ironic as it is, has saved already more than one life. She has also opened a Pandora's box. Andrews is going to realize that indeed there is a problem in our schools with some of the personnel, some of the leaders, and with our youth. Like Meli said: "If we all dropped the act and the injustice; if instead we worked together, we would change not only Andrews but the entire world." I remember her smiling as she told me: "Why can't we all instead be friends, Mami?" I only hope that through her death others can identify their own feelings. If they too are suffering, hopefully they will not ignore it because the pain will remain. Choosing to ignore problems and pain will not make them go away. The problem will grow each day like a monster. So I ask that everyone help our youth. Don't allow a single young person to die in this manner. Don't let another mother die from pain as she continues living. Right now I am not sure hot to go about living; I sometimes don't want to go on. My life has been changed forever. I feel empty. I am in tears and in pain. I do not wish this on my worst enemy. Right now I should be saving for her Christmas present which was going to be the down payment on her new Avalanche. Instead, I'm saving for her tombstone. I should be seeing that her college applications be sent in on time and not putting flowers at her grave. May God hold my princess in His arms. May He give her peace and the justice that no one here wanted to give her. Melissa's mom, Lupe Flores
By christine, Saturday, December 20, 2008 10:29:42 AM
I would like my angles to help me with my ego.It gets in my way and that is hard for me
By Leslie, Friday, November 21, 2008 01:53:35 AM
The last 4 digits of my phone # are 1111. I just recently learned of the whole story of the message. It was issued to me about 6 years ago, and I believe it was Gods way of telling me that he was with me. Soon after recieving my new phone #, I began the most challenging part of my life. I married a dark entity who eventually abused me so bad , it literally gave me fibromyalgia from severe emotional trauma.Then I founf out he had infected me with Hepatitus C. I went through a year of HORRIBLE treatments that caused horrible side effects. Then I lost my son in a car accident, but I beat Hep. C. I now want to heal others who share my experiences and belief in the power of positive thinking. I chose to make rainbows ouy of potholes!
By christine, Thursday, November 20, 2008 08:27:03 AM
I thank the angles for letting me see that my life although hard at times is happy and i have a great Manny blessings.
By christina, Thursday, November 20, 2008 02:57:40 AM
One night...I think it was in October while I was living in Salem Oregon at the age of eight years old, I was dragged into the wood-shop by my dad, where he proceeded to beat me with a long strip of plexi-glass. During the beating I had no idea it was a piece of plexi-glass, I thought it WAS glass. I was terrified of being cut, and not being alive. Later, after my numb body was in bed, I wept soundly and was completely hopeless...then, I saw this white light at the foot of my bed where I was curled up. Slowly I saw the shape of my Angel appear. (I'm sure he's one of many, as for you too.) I was crying so hard I was hic-cuping, but I saw clear as day, there were his soft bluish wings, and this beautiful face, which didn't mouth a single word, but still told me, it would all be fine, I was loved and I had nothing to fear. Never had I felt so enveloped with love, conpassion and sweet comfort!! I felt completely surrounded in one thing...LOVE! So sweet and just what this little girl needed!I must also say, that our angels are with us each and every day. Thank you, my blue-winged Angel.
By Lisa, Wednesday, November 19, 2008 10:00:41 PM
By Brenda, Wednesday, November 19, 2008 08:15:04 PM
Heres a site for those seeking the answers to seeing numbers such as 111 or 11.11 or 444 and so on like me i see 11.11 on a daily bases no matter wher ei am or what im doing found this web site to explain it all hope u find peace with it as i have ty.. http://www.1111spiritguardians.com/
By megan, Tuesday, November 18, 2008 07:17:26 PM
my partner and are trying to conceive a child over 6 years. He had low sperm. Two years in Sept. we took a break, I realize I was pregnant and I had miscarriage Two years ago. Last may I had cyst removed and they told me that my lf tube is blocked and my rt tube is semi blocked. We can't afford IVF treatment. I'm 39 years old, What is the chance for me being pregnant again. I'm concern even though my age and tube is blocked
By kathy, Tuesday, November 18, 2008 05:54:45 PM
hey Elizabeth how have you been i haven't heard for you in a while i was kind of worried about you. so are you going to be tuned in tomorrow to listen to Sylvia? i am i just hope this time she answers my question.(even though i forgot what i asked! ha ha) well i hope everything goes well with you and i hope you see your boys soon. i hope you have a nice holiday with them. I'll say a pray for you and your boys tonight. have a nice thanksgiving if i don't talk to you before thanksgiving!
By Wanda, Monday, November 17, 2008 11:48:05 PM
I would like to know my angels name. Thank you Robert E
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