By Lavern, Saturday, July 12, 2008 08:23:48 AM
There’s nothing wrong about dating when you are already 40 years old. It’s just shows that the person is having fun with life. No bitterness and regrets of what had nature dictated on her situation, no one to blame for that person’s decision, to follow what her heart desires for the moment. Dating does not mean you want to have a serious relationship with the opposite sex. It’s just that one wants a companion while having a cup of coffee, discussing any topic under the sun.

By melanie, Friday, July 11, 2008 05:20:30 PM
a great article. i have many female clients over 40 that say they just havent had the opportunities to meet men to begin dating. i've not looked in 7 yrs and am just opening up now(will be 47 this yr), and believe that it is about being open to attracting a partner in life is a huge part of dating again. i have not looked for it but some opportunities are presenting themselves. i am very overweight, but i feel confident and secure in my body and energy, and believe I am attracting a few good men as a result because i am now open to loving unconditionally for the first time in my life and not even looking for it, but just being it, along with having a lot of faith with patience:)

By Jeannette, Friday, July 11, 2008 11:03:12 AM
I'm a 44 years old single woman for the past 21 years, since my soul mate past away. I never had a real relationship because of my two children. I had my share of male friends, but none of them lived with me. I just didn't want any man running my household and telling my kids what to do. Now my kids are grow with kids of their own. I am raising a grand daughter who is four years old and now I've been out of the dating scene for over five years. The problem is to find the man who is honest with himself and not be insulted my the woman intellect is very hard to find. I find that most men are afraid of smart women because of their insecurities. I'm looking for a man who can relate to intellectly because money don't impress me in anyway. A strong minded man who can lead him own way and at the same time be loving to the woman needs is what I'm looking for. That is why I've been alone for so long. I'm not looking to get married but I do want a serious relationship. Maybe God will Bless me someday with one. No I"m not desparate to find one either I can wait.

By Susanne, Thursday, July 10, 2008 11:13:26 PM
I'm 43 and recently out of a 20 year marriage. At first the whole dating scene seemed overwhelming and scary, but I have to admit..it is much more fun now, than when I was 20. There are no shortage of men, only good men. But the great thing about dating now is, that there is no biological clock ticking. I dont have to get or be married before a certain time. I know all about what I DON'T want now...and a lot more about what I do want. I am able to just relax and enjoy as I go. And guess what?...the men know a lot more about what they don't want etc..It makes a big difference. I don't want to be alone forever, but eventually I'll meet THE one. I can wait, and this time I'll make sure it's the right one :)

By drizzle, Thursday, July 10, 2008 08:35:16 PM
Pamela, I just want to pat you on the back for such eloquent and honest comments! Good luck to you, girl! You deserve it and I hope you meet a lovely man if and when you want one. :)

By Prasanna, Wednesday, July 09, 2008 08:00:27 AM
Its true that women of 40 years of age will have greater experience. In this kind of relationship, most of the people do not want to get into any relationship or a serious commitment. Having fun and then get parted. So these women are just 18 with 22 years of experience. They will take care of the guys in dating knowing much things. I would rather say that these women will satisfy the guys in a much better way than others.

By Pamela, Wednesday, July 09, 2008 07:57:35 AM
I apologize for the double posting. I clicked off my comment to look at email and I came back and finished typing my post. After I hit 'Post Comment' i found my unfinished post had already published. There's no way to edit or delete a post here so all I can do is say I'm sorry.

By Pamela, Wednesday, July 09, 2008 07:54:15 AM
Melvin - you sweet innocent boy :-) Dating now is so much easier than it was when I was your age - actually a little younger since I married when I was 19. There is absolutely NO desperation now. I'm 56 so I'm probably older than your mother but I can tell you from experience that the clock is NOT ticking down for me. People over 40 are living longer and healthier lives than ever before. I have the time and means now to take care of ME instead of worrying about the expenses of doctor visits for children, schooling for children, does the husband who is older than me need a new (fill in the blank - car, motorcycle, boat, clothes) because he's going through a mid-life crisis. Am I being selfish? Maybe a little - but I was totally about the family from the time I realized I had responsibilities until I became single 2 years ago. I'm still a vibrant, loving, giving and now much happier person. I'm not as ignorant as I was when I was younger when it comes to knowing there are and always will be differences between the sexes and I appreciate those differences. I don't feel the need to be so serious about anyone I date and I'm much more relaxed and therefore a better person because of it. I'll guarantee you this Melvin - wine becomes better with age, and so do people. I can work rings around most women half my age and I can relax and have fun when the work is done. It's all about balance and us "over the hill" women you see as "a little desperate" are, for the most part, some of the most fun-loving, happy, giving and balanced women you'll ever meet. The chronological clock, for us, has pretty much become less of our focus and enjoying each day as it arrives takes absolute priority. Stop thinking about age and allow yourself to see the value of each person for what it is. Me desperate?? Thanks for a good laugh. What a wonderful way to start my day :-)

By Pamela, Wednesday, July 09, 2008 07:41:31 AM
I am 56 and divorced my husband of 36 years 2 years ago (after being separated for 6 years prior to that). I had stayed in the marriage, which was full of abuse (verbal, physical, mental) for years because I was so afraid of being alone and because I was brought up with the belief that marriage was forever. I almost died at the hands of my husband because of trying to live as others would have me live. Leaving my husband and allowing the 'me' who had been stiffled for so many years was the best thing I've ever done. The good thing about being off the clock as far as baby making goes is there's no feeling of urgency to marry or procreate. For the first time in my life I'm able to enjoy the company of my date, without feeling we have to be serious and scope each other out as prospective mates or a parent to existing children or future children. I love the liesurely exploration of dating now. I don't feel guilty if I date someone for fun - even if he's not the man I'd want to live with for the remainder of my life. Different palates are awakened by different types of dates. I'm just careful not to cultivate friendships with anyone who even remotely feels like someone who would abuse me in any way.

By Green, Wednesday, July 09, 2008 04:19:05 AM
I just turned 30 and I really don't want to find myself needing to date at the age of 40. I can just imagine how difficult it might be. At 40, a lot of people are already in a long term relationship and finding single people at that age must be difficult. I guess the key to being successful at it, just like the article mentioned is not to feel desparate, have confidence in yourself and be patience.